


The World Is So Big

by apfelgranate



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Heart-to-Heart, Hurt/Comfort, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-15 07:50:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18069476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apfelgranate/pseuds/apfelgranate
Summary: They have a close call, and Hiccup doesn’t take it well.Set during HTTYD 3, though only tangentially concerned with canon.





	The World Is So Big

**Author's Note:**

> Tagged with both relationship tags for Hiccup and Toothless because it's like… not explicitly romantic? But also not explicitly not-romantic. Basically read it whichever way you prefer :D

Toothless is no longer bleeding.

Hiccup knows this, feels the dried rust and the bandages with his own hands, but his eyes still see the sluggish red coating half the dragon’s head and throat. His ears still hear the sickening wet sound of fangs that had sought Toothless’s throat and found his jaw and ear flaps instead. His dragon’s howl of pain as the deathgripper had driven Toothless into the wall and tried to poison him.

Behind him, people are talking in low voices, but Hiccup can’t focus on anything but Toothless. He lays his face against the uninjured side of Toothless’s head and finds the slow, blessedly steady beat of Toothless’s pulse with his fingers, and clings to that thrum like a lifeline.

Something touches his shoulder.

“We will find Grimmel,” Astrid says, in her low, determined chieftain voice. Her hand squeezes his shoulder, then lifts. “He can’t hide forever. When he shows his face again, we will make him pay.”

Hiccup nods slightly, as much as he can without losing contact with Toothless’s scales. He doesn’t look up; Astrid sighs. She hesitates, but then her steps fade. With them, the remaining voices disappear as well. For a brief moment, he thinks he’s alone with Toothless but then he hears a soft shuffling sound. He recognizes his mother’s breathing, her careful steps. She doesn’t say anything, waiting for him to fill the silence.

“This is my fault,” Hiccup whispers. His throat is tight, the words leave him wet and thick with tears. He barely had kept himself from breaking down in front of Astrid and the others when Gothi had tended to their wounds, but now…

“Hiccup—”

“I thought I could let Grimmel into my own fucking house and get the better of him, I thought I hadn’t underestimated him, _again_ , like a goddamned _idiot_ , and now Toothless is—”

“ _Hiccup_.”

He sucks in a shuddering breath, biting his lip to keep in a sob.

“Don’t torture yourself like this,” Valka says. “Toothless will heal, just like you will.”

“You can’t know that! What if he can’t echolocate anymore? What if I keep dragging him into danger and it chips away at him until there’s nothing left? What—what if I get him _killed_ next time?”

“Toothless isn’t helpless. Neither are you. What you’ve created is beautiful, and that man will learn to see it, too.”

“Yeah, sure, just like I made Drago see the light. It was so stupid, like I could change his mind!” He swallows a snarl. “Changing the world—such a childish dream!”

The hook of Valka’s staff catches his shoulder and pulls, forcing him to look up at her.

“That dream came _true_.” Her mouth is a pained line, tension etched into the sharp lines of her face. “I gave up once, Hiccup. I fled. But you managed something I thought _impossible_.”

“That was one village! The world—the world is _so big_.”

That thought used to exhilarate him. Now it only sends helpless fear like ice into his chest.

“It is,” Valka says quietly. “It is vast, and there are bad people in it. There always will be. And you won’t be able to convince all of them to change their ways.”

Hiccup laughs harshly, though it comes out half a sob. “Tha—that’s real helpful, Mom, thanks.”

Warmth shifts behind Hiccup as Valka goes down on one knee, bringing her mouth level with his ears. Her fingers card through his hair, gently skimming over the bandage that’s wrapping around his head.

“But you’re not alone.” She kisses his bare temple then lays her forehead against it, and Hiccup clenches his eye shut, though it does little to stop the tears. 

For a long time, the two of them stay like that, breathing in unison with Toothless, while Hiccup cries quietly. Finally Toothless begins to stir beneath him, small growls leaving his chest. Valka kisses the skin next to Hiccup’s eye and unfolds herself, standing up.

“You're not alone,” she repeats. “And I for one don’t intend to give up on this.” The door closes behind her almost soundlessly.

Toothless’s head shifts; the growl softens into a purr, and large green eyes blink open. Hiccup hastily wipes at his eye, like the momentary lack of tears can hide the fact he’s been bawling like a baby over his dragon.

“Hey, buddy.”

Toothless’s eyes go wide, and he warbles in concern.

“What’s wrong, bud?” Hiccup casts his gaze around the hut, looking for the source of alarm, until Toothless licks his cheek. Devastatingly gently, compared to his usual slobber. Confused, Hiccup touches his own cheek, feeling nothing but skin and dragon spit—and the bandage. Right.

“It looks worse than it is,” Hiccup tries to soothe him. “Don’t worry. I probably won’t even lose the eye.”

Toothless seems less than satisfied with that half-baked explanation and whines, nuzzling Hiccup’s chin with enough force to make him fall over onto his back.

“I’m okay, I’m okay, I promise!”

Toothless just snorts and pins him to the ground with one lazy paw across his chest, then proceeds to carefully nuzzle him some more. Hiccup breathes heavily, chest tight, and it’s not because there’s a dragon lying on him. A long gash snakes along Toothless’s jaw, half his ear is missing. While the paste of herbs and bandages Gothi applied seem to have numbed the pain for now, the sight still makes Hiccup’s heart clench with guilt.

“I’m so sorry,” he murmurs, reaching out to run his hands along the ridge of spikes on Toothless’s forehead. Toothless purrs and pushes into the touch and Hiccup obligingly scratches him, his heart doing its best to climb into his throat and choke him.

“I love you so much, you overgrown lizard,” he manages. “You know that, right?” Toothless stills and raises his head to look at him. Blinks, very slowly. Nudges his nose against Hiccup’s and coos.

Hiccup laughs wetly and wraps his arms around Toothless’s head to hug him, careful not to touch his injuries.

“Yeah, me too.” He sighs and looks at the ceiling, the heavy wooden beams carved with ravens and staves.

“What do you think, buddy,” he murmurs. “Can we do this?”

Toothless chirps in question. “No, not just Grimmel, but the whole… all the people who will come afterwards. The dragonhunters. The people who’ve only ever lived in fear of dragons, even if they never set out to kill them. The world is… it’s really fucking big.”

Toothless makes a considering noise, and then rolls his eyes with great deliberation.

“It’s not a stupid question! You got _hurt—_ ” Toothless huffs and licks his cheek again. “Okay, we _both_ got hurt. That doesn’t make it any better.”

Chuffing with exasperation, Toothless actually lifts off of him and traipses to the fireplace. He drags a piece of charred wood from it with his teeth, and starts scribbling on the floor.

“Gothi’s not gonna like that,” Hiccup says, slowly. Toothless just flicks his tail fin into Hiccup’s face, then uses it to beckon him close. Hiccup hobbles over and steadies himself on Toothless’s back, which isn’t easy considering the dragon is constantly moving.

“Is that supposed to be… the world? No, the archipelago?”

Toothless nods eagerly, then puts charcoal to wood again. Starting with Berk, he fills in the little islands with black, one by one. It’s messy—he misses spots, or draws over the outlines—and it takes a good long while, but…

Bit by bit, the world changes.

“Oh.”

Hiccup rubs at his unbandaged eye, feeling rather foolish and also like he’s about to start crying yet again. Toothless coos at him, charcoal stick forgotten on the floor, and wraps his wings around him, tugging him into a warm, scaly embrace. They end up in a heap on the floor, limbs awkwardly curled around one another to avoid their various wounds. The ice in Hiccup’s chest starts to melt at last.

“Why’d you have to be so goddamned sensible,” he mutters into the scales of Toothless’s throat. “You and Mom both. Couldn’t just indulge my panic, could you.”

Toothless laughs, shaking both of them. It quickly gentles into a deep, steady purr, and he presses his forehead against the top of Hiccup’s head.

_Gods_ , Hiccup thinks as he lies there, with Toothless’s warm, living weight wrapped around him. _Odin, Thor, Freya, Loki. Any god that any human or dragon has ever held holy._

_Keep him safe while we change the world._

_I’ll give my eye, I’ll give my other leg, I’ll give my life if I have to, but keep him safe._

**Author's Note:**

> Hiccup's ending narration of HTTYD 2 includes the lines: "We are the voice of peace, and bit by bit, we will change the world."  
> Idk what happened that by the time of the third movie apparently everyone has forgotten about that. (And maybe I'm just a tiiiny bit salty about it. Okay I can't lie, it's salt flats city over here, but at least we're all getting fic out of it.)


End file.
